Wednesday, January 4, 2023

Experiment

Embed from Getty Images

Tuesday, June 12, 2018

REVIEW 174: THE KRAGLE IPA

COUNTRY OF ORIGIN:  USA (Perkasie, PA!)

BREWERY:  Free Will Brewing Company

STYLE:  IPA

ABV:  6.6%

PURCHASE:  Draft (pint), $6.00

SERVING:  Chilled pint glass. Perfect 3/4-inch high crown. Much better than average retention.

APPEARANCE:  Beautiful light-gold body with a spongy white head. A little translucent. Not a lot of visible bubbling. Excellent lacing.

AROMA:  Hops (surprise, surprise) with citrus notes of grapefruit and lemon rind. Possible tease of orange, possible tease of caramel (likely a placebo effect at work). Hint of malt and grain. Floral.

TASTE:  One of the smoothest IPAs I've had in a while. Medium body that leans slightly in the direction of heavy. Carbonation is initially mellow and only becomes sharp if held unusually long. Avoids the typical IPA trap of too much hoppiness. Nice crescendo of both hops and citrus notes, with the citrus--again, primarily grapefruit and lemon--carrying the aftertaste. Not overly complex, but very well balanced. 

MUSINGS AND METAPHORS:  Sometimes there's strength in simplicity. This brew doesn't try to do a whole lot. But what it does, it does well.

What I really liked about this IPA is not only that it didn't over-rely on hops, but it also didn't have what I call that "artificial sweetener" quality in the aftertaste that so many others seem to have these days. It's what separates the great IPAs from the rest of the pack.

Free Will Brewing, from Perkasie, Pennsylvania, in upper central Bucks County, brews 13--yes, 13--IPAs, comprising almost half their entire lineup. They have a tap room in the popular outdoor shopping center known as Peddler's Village, in Lahaska, which is roughly 15 miles to the east, and only a few miles west of the Delaware River. If you're in the area, I highly recommend checking it out.




GRADE:   A-



Tuesday, June 5, 2018

REVIEW 173: CCCCC IPA

COUNTRY OF ORIGIN:  USA  (Yardley, PA!)

BREWERY:  Vault Brewing Company

STYLE:  IPA

ABV:  6.4%

PURCHASE:  Draft (12 oz.), $7.00

SERVING:  Footed gibraltar glass. Perfect one-inch head from the tap with very good retention.

APPEARANCE:  Very nice, golden yellow-orange body takes on a "sunrise/sunset" kind of appearance. Bright white, densely packed crown. Visually speaking, could pass for a witbier or hefeweizen. Not much in the way of visible bubbling, and on the first go-round, not much lacing. That changed next beer; must have been an issue with the "beer-cleanliness" of the glassware. (Google it.) 

AROMA:  Hoppy (no shit). But also has prominent notes of caramel and citrus, particularly in the form of grapefruit. Orange and lemon zest seems to sneak in there, as well as some other fruit--my guess is mango. A little bready as well.

TASTE:  Hoppy (no shit). But also has prominent notes of caramel and citrus, particularly in the form of grapefruit. Some other fruit seems to factor into the taste profile, seems to be melon or mango, possibly orange. Moderately carbonated with a relatively light mouthfeel for an over-6% brew. A little yeasty. The one major downfall here is a stubborn, artificial sweetener quality that seems to crescendo at the back and linger in the aftertaste. 

MUSINGS AND METAPHORS:  Multidimensional for an IPA, and that's a positive. A lot of IPAs fall into the trap of being hoppy and pretty much nothing else. This one strives for more, and just about gets there. 

So why is it called "CCCCC?" Or, "5Cs," for short? Because of the five varieties of hops used in the brewing process for this beer, all of which begin with, you guessed it, the letter C: Cascade, Centennial, Columbus, Chinook, and Citra.

They couldn't use just four. "CCCC" already belongs to a community college somewhere, I'd bet. And "4Cs" is too close to 4C (potential lawsuit).




GRADE:  B+



Thursday, May 10, 2018

REVIEW 172: NEGRA MODELO

COUNTRY OF ORIGIN:  Mexico

BREWERY:  Grupo Modelo S.A. de C.V.

STYLE:  Vienna Lager

ABV:  5.4%

PURCHASE:  Case (two 12-packs) of 24 12-oz. bottles, $32.99

SERVING:  12-oz. bottle, poured into pint glass. Not very heady; a standard (20-second) pour yielded only about half an inch, which disappeared quickly. I had to pour fast to produce a head with any worthwhile retention, and even then it was less than an inch.

APPEARANCE:  Amber-mahogany body and fairly see-through for a darker beer. Tannish-white wispy head (while it lasts). Conspicuous and faster than average bubbling action. The occasional strand of thin suds, but no real lacing.

AROMA:  Bready--in particular, the crust of a loaf of bread from your local supermarket--and not much else. I challenge you to run to the store and pick up a loaf of Wonder, Strohmann, or any mass-produced white bread of choice. Then take a blind smell test with this beer. Do it.

TASTE:  Despite the bubbling, the carbonation remains in check with this one, though it is formidable. Somewhat seltzer-like at first, with a thin and somewhat watery mouthfeel; makes for easy but ultimately uninspiring drinking. On the whole, the hop-malt balance is dead even early on, with hops gaining a slight victory at the end. Has the "cooked veggie" quality of an adjunct to a minor extent. Not very flavorful until the very end, when the aftertaste kicks in with what seems to be appleskin and tea notes. Comes off kind of like a Mexican version of Yuengling.

MUSINGS AND METAPHORS:  Bleh. There was a time when I honestly thought this was arguably the best Mexico had to offer, aside from perhaps Bohemia. (Admittedly, I have yet to come across a real craft beer from south of the border.) Something definitely has changed. Or maybe my palate simply evolved.

Still looking for that truly great Mexican brew, as this was, sad to say, disappointingly part of the pack.




GRADE:   C-

The pack.


Thursday, April 19, 2018

REVIEW 171: ESTRELLA DAMM

COUNTRY OF ORIGIN:  Spain

BREWERY:  Damm S.A.

STYLE:  Pale Lager

ABV:  5.4%

PURCHASE:  Six-pack of 11.2-oz. bottles, $11.99

SERVING:  11.2-oz. bottle, poured into pint glass. My 20-second "normal" pour produced an initial head of two inches. My 30-second "slow" pour yielded an ideal inch to inch-and-a-half. Decent (if unspectacular) retention, particularly for a Euro lager from outside Germany. According to the Allstrom brothers at beeradvocate.com, the label used to list "stabilizer e-405" as one of the ingredients, which aids in the maintenance of foam in the beer. What is stabilizer e-405? According to Wikipedia, it's another name for a compound called propylene glycol alginate, a commonly used food additive. What is propylene glycol alginate? I didn't get that far. Fuck do I look like? A scientist?

APPEARANCE:  Golden, but a bit on the darker side of golden for a pale lager. See-through, but a bit on the hazy side for a pale lager. Slightly off-white tinted head. Typical bubbling action. Decent, but somewhat irregular lacing.

AROMA:  Bready at first, especially with the full head in your face. (Did that come out right?)  Teases of hops and malt dextrins. Generic veggie quality to it. Even a bit ricey. Rice is also listed as one of the ingredients on the label, but thankfully at only 1%. I suppose at such a low proportion, it doesn't qualify as an adjunct. 

TASTE:  Fairly thin with what I call "passive-aggressive carbonation"; in other words, the carbonation doesn't always have the same presence, but when it shows up, it seems to act up a bit. Yeasty backbone that runs constant. It seems to crescendo a bit at the finish along with an accent of malt. The resulting aftertaste is the most balanced part of the experience, as it is ever so slightly hoppy. It's somewhat sweet overall, and not in a sugary way; the far end of the aftertaste seems to take on a Sweet'n Low character. I know the taste of Sweet'n Low very well. I don't put it in anything. I know it because when I was younger, I used to suck down packets of it with the sole purpose of getting a reaction of whoever was within a few feet of me. Boys do that stuff.

MUSINGS AND METAPHORS:  Estrella Damm dates back to 1876, when August Küntzmann Damm founded the brewery that bears his name in Barcelona, where it continues to crank out an entire line of brews. He named his flagship beer, "Estrella," which means, "star." It's the oldest beer brand in Spain, at any rate.

Küntzmann. Küntzmann. The umlaut--the two dots over the "u"--says it all. German. It was a German that originated this beer. A-ha. And watch how you pronounce that word. The two dots over the "u" is pronounced like the English short "i" sound (as in "stick"). 

It was an Austrian who founded Dos Equis in Mexico, and a German who founded Estrella Damm in Spain. In both cases, the modern version is adequate at best. Although, this is the better of the two.

The online beer snob community trashes this one, but it's really not bad. It's essentially Spain's version of Budweiser, but a tad better. And I've said this a thousand times by now: Every country has its Budweiser. Every country has to have that easily accessible "beer of all seasons," I guess. This fits that bill, though its clearly not the "star" its name alludes to.

After three of these, I think I now have Sweet-n Low breath.




GRADE:  C



Tuesday, April 17, 2018

REVIEW 170: SAMUEL ADAMS COLD SNAP (REVISITED)

COUNTRY OF ORIGIN:  USA (Jamaica Plain, MA)

BREWERY:  Boston Beer Company

STYLE:  Witbier

ABV:  5.3%

PURCHASE:  Case (two 12-packs) of 24 12-oz. bottles, $36.99

SERVING:  12-oz. bottle, poured into pint glass. Much headier from the bottle than it was on tap; took up over half the glass, initially, before "settling" into the three-inch range--and that was with a standard pour of roughly 20 seconds. A slower pour of roughly 30 seconds didn't get much less. Great retention.

APPEARANCE:  Murky, golden-orange body; "hazy" wasn't quite an adequate word here. Off-white, spongy and dense head bordering upon cream. Ever so faint bubbling visible if you look hard enough. No lacing.

AROMA:  Mostly wheat and coriander. Some orange peel and citrus notes round things out. 

TASTE:  Not fully fleshed out at the forefront; shy citrus notes are evident but not much else. Very smooth, medium-thin body with soft but still conspicuous carbonation. Fairly even, orange zest/coriander palate until the somewhat yeasty finish, when more complexity takes hold. Slightly peppery uptick at the back. Aftertaste is "wet" (as opposed to "dry" or "clean"), with orange, lemon, and a continuance of the various generic spices. (Note: This is supposedly brewed with plum as well, but I found it hard to make out. Also, I didn't notice any real banana presence as I did when I reviewed this on tap in one of my earliest entries on this blog.)

MUSINGS AND METAPHORS:  I still maintain this is a better version of Blue Moon. It's versatile and never out of place, and though it's marketed in late winter, I find it equally suitable to late spring and summer drinking. It's an outstanding thirst-quenching brew, and what I call a "juicy" beer (for obvious reasons).

That said, my original impression remains unchanged in another respect. Like a lot of Sams these days, Cold Snap is ultimately not a very memorable experience. There's too many out there like it, for one thing. More importantly, it just seems to settle in that oh-so-familiar good-but-not-great territory that, lately, seems to be Sam's hallmark.

You know what "cold snap" actually refers to? A sudden, brief spell of cold weather. Which is what we experienced yesterday in my neck of the woods (if you consider the 40s "cold").

It's also a Chinese herbal supplement.



ORIGINAL GRADE:  B

NEW GRADE:  B


Thursday, April 12, 2018

REVIEW 169: BALTIKA #7 EXPORT

COUNTRY OF ORIGIN:  Russian Federation

BREWERY:  Baltika Breweries

STYLE:  Dortmunder

ABV:  5.4%

PURCHASE:  Six-pack of 11.2-oz. bottles, $13.99

SERVING:  11.2-oz. bottle, poured into pint glass. A standard pour yielded a two-inch initial head. Average retention, more or less. A slower pour took about half an inch off the crown.

APPEARANCE:  Straw-colored, see-through body, a bit darker than your typical adjunct or macrolager. Very bright white head. Steady bubbling and almost no lacing to speak of.

AROMA:  Bready, bready, and bready. Very little hop presence and maybe a touch of generic malt. Kind of smells like a Heineken.

TASTE:  Medium-thin mouthfeel with fairly prominent carbonation. No attention-grabber here; neutrality seems to be the theme. Bready taste, mostly, and never really wavers. A bit yeastier at the finish with a slightly malty and fusel-ish aftertaste. Makes for a smooth but unremarkable sipping experience.

MUSINGS AND METAPHORS:  This is supposed to be a Dortmunder, a decidedly German style of beer. It's got the bready quality down cold. (Dortmunders are known for that.) Malt? Check, albeit minimal. Something was off, though. It seemed overcarbonated, and over-alcoholic at the end of each sip. Tasted like it could have come from Anheuser-Busch.

Well, you could consider Baltika the Russian A-B. They're the largest brewery in that country, and the second largest in Europe. Established in 1990, they were taken over by Carlsberg in 2008, but production remains in St. Petersburg.

Baltika #7 is one of a series of "numbered" brews from the relatively young brewery. They have a non-alcoholic beer aptly named "#0." This one is called "#7 Export" presumably because Dortmunders are also known as "export lagers." It should be called "#7 Bleh."




GRADE:  C-

BONUS POINTS . . . for the distinguishable peel-off bottle caps. No bottle opener needed!


Monday, February 26, 2018

REVIEW 168: MILWAUKEE'S BEST PREMIUM

COUNTRY OF ORIGIN:  USA

BREWERY:  Miller Brewing Co.

STYLE:  Adjunct Lager

ABV:  4.8%

PURCHASE:  Case of 30 12-oz. cans, $15.33

SERVING:  12-oz. can, poured into pint glass. Very, very heady with just a standard pour; took up 3/4 of the glass. Decent retention, too. It takes a very slow pour to produce an initial head of under two inches. 

APPEARANCE:  Whitest head I ever did see, I tell you what. Pale golden body reminiscent of beer commercials from the '80s. Minimal bubbling. Some lacing--more like a few random splotches. 

AROMA:  Fairly clean scent. Not skunky. Not off-putting at all. But there's almost nothing there. Some graininess. Maybe, just maybe, a hop or two fell into the vat during the brewing process. Know what I smell? WATER. After having used it to boil rice.

TASTE:  Lightly carbonated and THIN. One of the easiest beers to "pound." Agreeable enough taste; on the other hand, it has almost no "beer character" whatsoever. Somewhat yeasty finish; that's about it. Believe it or not, there seems to be a touch of lemon rind in the aftertaste. Could be the placebo effect at work, but I'm still downing these as I type this review, and I'm still noticing it. 

MUSINGS AND METAPHORS:  There's beer, and there's just beer-flavored water. As the latter, this really ain't bad. Maybe it's even "premium" as it says on the can! But as the former, it's mediocre.

But see, in this case, "mediocre" is actually a compliment. When I was in college, this, along with the two Nattys, made up what I called the "Frat Guy Triumvirate." In other words, they were the Big Three* among cheap beers designed to go down easy at parties, in order to get the opposite sex in the mood to do the same a couple hours later.

For several years, Milwaukee's Best was nicknamed the "Beast." Just thought I'd throw that out there.




GRADE:   D

*Busch arguably made it the Big Four.


Tuesday, December 12, 2017

REVIEW 167: PAULANER OKTOBERFEST MÄRZEN

COUNTRY OF ORIGIN:  Germany

BREWERY:  Paulaner Brauerei GmbH & Co. KG 

STYLE:  Märzen/Oktoberfest

ABV:  5.8%

PURCHASE:  Six-pack of 11.2-oz. bottles, $13.99

SERVING:  11.2-oz. bottle, poured into pint glass. 2 1/2" head with a normal pour. A slow pour got less than an inch. A fast one on beer #3 got about three full inches, if only briefly. So-so retention.

APPEARANCE:  An Oktoberfest that doesn't stand out visually. Light copper body, kind of like a penny, that borders on dark gold. Beige-white head. Transparent with minor bubbling. No lacing around the glass whatsoever.

AROMA:  Somewhat grassy, with a "fresh veggie" vibe to it. A hint of grain and, possibly, a placebo note of hops if you're looking for it. Honestly smells like it could pass for a macrolager from this side of the Atlantic. 

TASTE:  An Oktoberfest whose taste contradicts its aroma. Roasty from the get-go. Forward notes of barley. Throughline of subtle richness. Increasingly hoppy toward the end, but still falls well short of IPA territory. Somewhat syrupy and fusel finish with a crescendo of caramel and a bit of generic spice. Smooth overall mouthfeel with standard carbonation. Goes down fast.

MUSINGS AND METAPHORS:  Thankfully, I have an open mind. I don't let a questionable first impression spoil an entire experience. Otherwise, I'd likely be shitting all over this.

Simple but effective taste profile. Doesn't do too much, but what it does do, it does damn well. Say that ten times fast. I dare you.

Paulaner is one of six German breweries who officially supply beer for Oktoberfest. They are not to be confused with the makers of "all-fruit." What's all-fruit? It's a fruity spread for toast, muffins, bagels, et al. But please, please, don't call it jelly.



GRADE:   B+






Thursday, October 26, 2017

REVIEW 166: YUENGLING OKTOBERFEST

COUNTRY OF ORIGIN:  USA (Pottsville, PA!)

BREWERY:  Yuengling Brewery

STYLE:  Märzen/Oktoberfest

ABV:  5.45%

PURCHASE:  Six-pack of 12-oz. bottles, $9.99

SERVING:  12-oz. bottle, poured into pint glass. A normal pour yielded a solid two-inch head. A slower pour yielded almost the same. Good retention.

APPEARANCE:  Transparent but a bit hazy. Color is a dark tan bordering upon light copper territory. Standard off-white tinted head, sudsy but somewhat dense. Thin but steady bubbling. Prominent, splotchy lacing. 

AROMA:  Toasted grains and subdued spice notes like allspice and cinnamon. A little malty. Effectively no hop presence.

TASTE:  Thin body and somewhat watery mouthfeel. Very, very easy to drink--I'll give it that. Standard carbonation. As far as the actual taste, well, it's a little slow to take hold. The early going is basically null and void; toasted grains enter the fray mid-palate. Faint traces of generic spices toward the end. Aftertaste also has a bit of appleskin character. Practically no hop presence. On the whole, this isn't much different from a regular Yuengling. 

MUSINGS AND METAPHORS:  I don't care how "storied" a brewery may be. Average is average. And Yuengling is usually just that . . . at best. They may as well be Leinenkugel's at this point. That's how unexciting their entire line of beers really is.

Bleh, bleh, and more bleh.

SPECIAL NOTE:  I reviewed this beer by request from a girl I know. I asked if I could use her photo at the end of the review, and she declined. You know, make her famous, at least among my two or three dozen regular readers? Oh well. It's possible that I will start having people "model" the beers I review. An idea has been spawned, my little droogs.




GRADE:   C-

Who asked Crockett to review this beer?