REVIEW 159: MICHELOB

COUNTRY OF ORIGIN:  USA (St. Louis)

BREWERY:  Anheuser-Busch

STYLE:  Pale Lager

ABV:  5.0%

PURCHASE:  Case of 24 12-oz. bottles, $25.99

SERVING:  12-oz. bottle, poured into pint glass. A normal pour produced your typical head of not quite an inch, which disappeared fairly quickly. A fast pour didn't get much more, though it stuck around much longer even considering the "extra." Head retention isn't the calling card for any beer from Anheuser-Busch anyway.

APPEARANCE:  Golden, as opposed to straw, body, with the usual see-through quality. Your typical sudsy white head. Prominent bubbling. Almost no lacing.

BOUQUET:  Bready but with a faint hop note. Not much else. Except water.

PALATE:  Middle-of-the-road mouthfeel with quick-setting carbonation. Grainy for the most part, especially early on. A tease of hops creeps in toward the otherwise yeasty finish. Slight hop reemergence in the aftertaste. Strong alcohol character at the end--fusel, like a malt liquor--despite being an average 5% beer. Could almost pass for Colt 45 under the right conditions.

MUSINGS AND METAPHORS:  Introduced by A-B co-founder Adolphus Busch in 1896 as a beer for "connoisseurs," Michelob really is a pale lager, as opposed to an adjunct lager; the malt proportion is "all-malt," with no rice, corn, or other adjuncts added. That's what distinguishes it from Budweiser. Perhaps that's why I always found it to be the best of the Anheuser-Busch lineup--whatever that's worth--at least until Shock Top came along.

You know what else distinguishes it from Budweiser--or, used to? The bottle. Who didn't love that bottle back in the day? They called it a "teardrop." I always thought of it as a lava lamp. I wish they'd bring it back. Now it's just like any other beer bottle out there. Another win for conformity.





GRADE:   C+

REVIEW 158: MUDBANK MILK STOUT

COUNTRY OF ORIGIN:  USA (Croydon, PA!)

BREWERY:  Neshaminy Creek Brewing Company

STYLE:  Milk Stout*

*Per the brewery's website, brewed with oats. Could be therefore classified as an oatmeal stout.

ABV:  6.5%

PURCHASE:  22-oz. bottle, $10.99

SERVING:  Said bottle, poured into Guinness branded imperial pint glass. Like many stouts, not very heady with a steady pour. This got maybe, maybe, half an inch with a normal pour from the bottle, which withered away in seconds. A faster pour, however, got some and then some more: Two and a half inches (or thereabouts). Congratulations. On that go-round, retention was solid but unspectacular. 

APPEARANCE:  Dark, dark brown bordering upon black--it's a freakin' stout. Tannish-beige head. Faint bubbling. Lacing is scattery at first, then better on the second pour, but dies anyway. 

BOUQUET:  Mostly oaty and malty. Caramel, chocolate, and berry-like fruit essences round things out. A hint of toffee seems evident as well.

PALATE:  Scratch the berry. I couldn't taste any. The toffee is also arguable, at best. Everything else was there, tempered by mild hop notes. Expertly balanced. Slightly heavier than average body, but smooth and inviting. Carbonation is timid at first, but becomes cola-like if held. Relatively sweet mouthfeel from start to finish, though in varying degrees. Finish is equally sweet and roasty. Chocolatey aftertaste--best part of a beer with a lot of contenders for "best part."

MUSINGS AND METAPHORS:  This was as addictive as your favorite junk food, and that, my friends, is the mark of a truly great beer. I couldn't stop drinking this tonight; I had to re-up almost immediately after every single sip, even toward the end of the session. 

I downed two 22-oz. bottles of this while listening to classic Guns N' Roses songs, and therein lies a fitting analogy. Like GNR, this isn't something you're into right away. But you force yourself to try it, then try it again, then again, and at some point . . . you're hooked. The other music out there just doesn't measure up. 

I actually started writing the final part of this review as "Patience" came on. Which is my advice for those of you who are put off by stouts. Give this one a chance, and "just use a little patience."

Yet another winner for Neshaminy Creek, yet another outstanding Philly-area brewery. 




GRADE:  A

REVIEW 157: WHIZBANG HOPPY BLONDE

COUNTRY OF ORIGIN:  USA (Fort Collins, Colorado)

BREWERY:  New Belgium Brewing

STYLE:  Blonde Ale

ABV:  5.7%

PURCHASE:  Draft (60-oz. pitcher), $10.00

SERVING:  Said pitcher, poured into chilled pint glass. Roughly one-inch head in the pitcher. Normal pour from pitcher to glass yielded a short-lived head of about half an inch. A fast pour, however, got almost three full inches. Who let the dogs out?

APPEARANCE:  Pale golden in color, with a typical off-white head. Narrow bubbling visible. Very good, consistent lacing.

BOUQUET:  Comes off like a pale ale--which it is at the end of the day, I suppose. Balanced between malted barley and noble hops, with some citrus thrown in. 

PALATE:  Comes off like a pale ale--which it is at the end of the day, I suppose. But it's a little underwhelming. Malty early on, giving way to a prominent noble hops bitterness fairly quickly. Joined at the finish by a generic citrus factor. Aftertaste seems dominated by a lemony and grapefruity note. Average in terms of texture and "fillingness." Soft carbonation that takes a while to assert itself. What's there is agreeable--I say this about a lot of beers, I know--but it just seems to be missing something. 

MUSINGS AND METAPHORS:  So what's a "whizbang" anyway? Merriam-Webster defines it, first and foremost, as "one that is conspicuous for noise, speed, excellence, or startling effect."

Google defines it as "a resounding success." Apparently, it also refers to a "small-caliber, high-velocity shell" in wide use during the First World War.

Urban Dictionary adds yet another "street" definition:  A mixture of heroin and cocaine known for its "one-two punch" effect on the user.  Yet another was the urgent need to urinate.

It was this last definition that fit this beer best. I'm about to go for the third time since finishing the pitcher.

GRADE:  C+

REVIEW 156: RUAIDRI IRISH RED ALE

COUNTRY OF ORIGIN:  USA (Hatboro, PA!)

BREWERY:  Crooked Eye Brewery

STYLE:  Irish Red Ale

ABV:  5.0%

PURCHASE:  Draft (60-oz. pitcher), $12.00

SERVING:  Said pitcher, poured into chilled pint glass. Not particularly heady from the tap. However, from the pitcher to the glass, a normal pour produced a head of two full inches. A slower pour actually got three. Very good retention. 

APPEARANCE:  Auburn-henna-mahogany body with a beige-cream head. No real visible bubbling. Prominent lacing, though it was more of a partial blanket than actual laces.

BOUQUET:  Malty, with strong presence of caramel and appleskins (like Newcastle). Lightly hopped. Seeming hints of toffee, cinnamon, and possibly allspice. 

PALATE:  Average body in terms of fillingness. Carbonation is mostly tame, but can sneak up on you. Early on, highly malty but doesn't pack a whole lot of punch overall. Fills out toward the end. Tea-like finish, with an immediate aftertaste that is equal parts dry, bitter, and yeasty, as well as heavy on the appleskin. As with the aroma, there seems to be a trace of subdued cinnamon or allspice, and becomes witbier-like at the far end with a placebo note of coriander. This is supposedly brewed with toffee, but I couldn't really make that out as I seemed to in the aroma.

MUSINGS AND METAPHORS:  "Ruaidri," is the Scottish-Gaelic origin of the name "Rory." It means "Red King." Fitting for an Irish . . . red . . . ale.

The beer itself is a noble effort, if not exactly royalty. I rank it accordingly.




GRADE:   B-

Rory Macdonald, the "Red King" of UFC.

REVIEW 155: PERONI NASTRO AZZURO

COUNTRY OF ORIGIN:  Italy

BREWERY:  Birra Peroni Industriale S. p. A.

STYLE:  Pale Lager

ABV:  5.1%

PURCHASE:  12-pack of 11.2-oz. bottles, $17.99

SERVING:  11.2-oz. bottle, poured into Peroni branded pilsner glass.  Initially very heady (over four inches). A slower pour didn't get much less. Great retention for a macrolager.

APPEARANCE:  The standard see-through straw body with the standard sudsy white head. Normal, visible bubbling. No real lacing around the glass; just the occasional splotch.

BOUQUET:  Balanced, mellow aroma that mostly sticks to the tried-and-true hop-malt dichotomy, but with a little husk to it.

PALATE:  Borders upon light beer territory. Mellow carbonation with a somewhat thin feel. Malty and a bit sweet upon entry. Delivers what the aroma promised: An even hop-malt split, for the most part, both in tempered proportions, and with husky overtones. Finishes on a slight accent of yeast. Goes down like Stella, right down to the slightly metallic aftertaste.

MUSINGS AND METAPHORS:  Originally founded by the namesake Peroni family in Lombardy, Italy in 1846. Giovanni Peroni then moved the brewery to Rome in 1864, six years before that city became the capital. Today? It's owned by Asahi, after being sold by SABMiller. Passed around the macrobrewery carousel like a second-rate coed. 

It's the most recognized beer brand in its home country . . . which means fuck-all when it comes to actual quality. The name "Nastro Azzuro" translates to "blue ribbon" in English, but this is far from a prize winner. Bleh.




GRADE:  C-

REVIEW 154: SAMUEL ADAMS HOPSCAPE

COUNTRY OF ORIGIN:  USA (Massachusetts)

BREWERY:  The Boston Beer Company

STYLE:  Pale Wheat Ale

ABV:  5.5%

PURCHASE:  Draft (60-oz. pitcher), $10.00

SERVING:  Said pitcher, poured into chilled pint glass. (Glass allowed to warm over time.) Initially heady from tap to pitcher. From pitcher to glass, however, not even half an inch of head from a normal pour. A faster pour got a little more than an inch. Solid retention.

APPEARANCE:  See-through but hazy. Golden-orange, "sunrise"-colored body. Off-white head. Not much visible bubbling. Outstanding lacing.

BOUQUET:  Prominent citrus presence, mainly grapefruit. Lightly hoppy. Seeming traces of wheat. Hard to pick up anything else.

PALATE:  Juicy--if I had to describe this in one word, that's it. Tastes almost like a shandy. Fairly smooth. Carbonation is shy at first but becomes a force if held just a few seconds. Starts on an unassertive note. At mid-palate, it decides it wants to he hoppy. Finishes with some zest, mainly from grapefruit bitterness. Hop bitterness lingers at that point as well. Aftertaste is a tad yeasty and carries a hint of coriander. Not much in the way of malt or grain . . . particularly wheat.

MUSINGS AND METAPHORS:  This is classified, officially, as a pale wheat ale. The problem is, it doesn't really taste that way. Where's the wheat?

On the whole, this came off as a beer that is simply not fully fleshed out. It supposedly is brewed with four different kinds of hops--but they don't make much of a presence. Grapefruit comes as advertised, but is held too much in check, almost to the point where you could mistake it for orange or lemon. That all said, it's very, very, very easy to drink. The taste is no less agreeable--a hallmark of most beers in the Sam lineup. 

But that's kind of what irks me here. It seems to me that Sam has been settling lately. Too many of their recent offerings have been just okay, or "good but not great." They seem to be playing it too safe. Reminds me of a great Johnny Rotten quote:  "I would much rather be loved or hated than just 'alright' or 'nice.'" Sam fits Mr. Rotten's latter description, lately.




GRADE:   B-

REVIEW 153: TRIPEL HORSE

COUNTRY OF ORIGIN:  USA

BREWERY:  River Horse Brewing Company

STYLE:  Tripel

ABV:  10.0%

PURCHASE:  Draft (13-oz.), $7.00

SERVING:  Tulip glass. Not very heady. From the tap, half an inch at the most. Not much retention.

APPEARANCE:  Golden-caramel colored body, with the usual whitish head. Conspicuous bubbling at the outset. Almost no lacing at all.

BOUQUET:  On the surface, a seeming hybrid of malt and citrus, namely orange. Spicy undertones, particularly clove, coriander, orange zest, and a seeming touch of pepper.

PALATE:  The usual carbonation, and a body that goes down easily for a ten-percenter. Starts malty, remains malty. But midway, the citrus takes hold, and matches the malt through the yeasty finish. Sweet aftertaste. Not much spice discernible, which is surprising given that it was makeable in the aroma. Could stand to be more multi-dimensional. 

MUSINGS AND METAPHORS:  Another in a long line of good-but-not-great brews from River Horse. 

This is brewed with three kinds of hops, but none were particularly noticeable. 

As for the name, it was inevitable. River Horse, Tripel Horse; easy enough. There is Triple Horse Studios, in Atlanta; however, the New Jersey brewery predates the film studio by thirteen years.




GRADE:   B